Casablanca

Casablanca: 1942, Directed by Michael Curtiz, starring Humphrey Bogart, Ingrid Bergman, et al. Won the Best Picture Oscar, 1943.

The Hype: In 1998, The American Film Institute celebrated a century of movie-making by asking members of the film industry to vote on the 100 Greatest Films of all time.

Casablanca ranked No. 2, right behind Citizen Kane. When the AFI tried again in 2007, Casablanca slipped to No. 3, ceding the coveted No. 2 slot to The Godfather, which set up a New Year's Battle in the BCS National Championship Game between Citizen Kane and Don Corleone.

For reasons that escape me, lots of people can't get enough of this tawdry soap opera. Harry Reasoner's last bit before retiring from 60 Minutes was his staking a claim that Casablanca was the greatest movie of all time.

The misquoted song request to Sam, the piano player:



The ending (Spoiler Alert to people new to the planet):



The reluctant acknowledgement: I recall years ago reading that the Stupid Movie Critic review of Casablanca would be: "Just a bunch of people standin' around doin' a lot of talkin'."

I remember that line because that's the impression I had of the movie when I was 19 or 20. I've caught bits and pieces of it over the years but 25 years later I caught it in its entirety on CBC's Saturday Night at the Movies.

The "Marc Horton"-style review (minus the extensive plot synopsis): The characters have no depth whatsoever; I wasn't invested in any of them other than the leads were movie stars. There's nothing remarkable about the cinematography and the tacked-on war footage is cheesy. For all the quotable lines, the dialogue feels forced and the story plays like it was cobbled together at a writer's retreat sponsored by the War Department. It's not very interesting as a political/war drama and it's not compelling as a romance (maybe to old ladies).

The reprieve: In a career that spanned dozens of films over 30 years, director Michael Curtiz directed Captain Blood, The Charge of the Light Brigade, The Adventures of Robin Hood, The Private Lives of Elizabeth and Essex, The Sea Hawk, Santa Fe Trail, and Yankee Doodle Dandy, all of which are eminently more watchable.

The Politically Incorrect Movie Review: It's a bunch of people standin' around doin' a lot of talkin'.