Gladiator

Gladiator, 2000, Russell Crowe, Richard Harris, Oliver Reed.

Marc Horton Plot Synopsis: Roman general Russell Crowe slaughters some Picts and Celts, gets named heir-apparent by the dying Ceasar, which pisses off Ceasar's son, Joaquin Phoenix. Son orders Crowe executed, along with his family. Crowe improbably dodges the Grim Reaper but ends up enslaved and sold into the gladiator biz, where he totally hauls ass. Date with destiny awaits. Won a sh!tload of hardware, including Best Picture - though not a quarter the move Traffic was , and approximately half the movie Erin Brokovich was - and for some reason Best Actor for Crowe.

Of Note: Oliver Reed died with three weeks left in shooting. He was engaged in a hardcore drinking game with some sailors on shore leave, suffered a massive heart attack, fell off his bar stool and died. That. Is Awesome.

Politically Incorrect Movie Review: Cartoon violence-porn features SF/X swordplay but no real humans were involved in the making of this movie. If you want gladiators you care about, watch Spartacus. If you want Roman politics, watch the silent-screen or Technicolor epic versions of Ben Hur.

Reds

Reds, 1981, starring Warren Beatty, Diane Keaton, Jack Nicholson, et al.

Marc Horton Plot Synopsis: Restless American progressive wants to write about important stuff. Ends up in revolutionary Russia. There's some suggestion that neither Americans nor Ruskies would understand freedom (of speech, particularly) if it bit them in the ass. And a mediocre love story. And some dubious reminiscing by people who knew Reed. Beatty won a golden trinket as Best Director, but the film lost to Chariots of Fire as Best Picture.

Politically Incorrect Movie Review: A wannabe epic with pretenses of Dr. Zhivago, Lawrence of Arabia and, hell, every David Lean movie ever made, written by, directed by, and starring a big-time Hollywood star who had the clout to get a movie made about a glorified labour organizer who got tangled up with the Bolsheviks.